RANGE: These most class-conscious of all sprites haunt private school reunions, society weddings, ski resorts, regattas, hunt club balls, squash, racketball, and bankruptcy courts; that is, wherever the alumni of expensive boarding schools are likely to be found. HABITS: Preps Ghouls like to get under the (upper) crust of the well (white)-bred. It is they who sprinkle dandruff on the shoulders of every navy blue blazer, dab a seagull dropping on the peak of each yachting cap, add a splash of hollandaise to every old school tie, spill a too-too embarrassing Bloody Mary stain on every white pleated skirt, and insert a bit of spinach (from the quiche) between the teeth of the hostess in the reception line. The favorite trick of a Preps Ghoul is to assume the form of the former class nerd (whose name you simply cawn’t remember), let it be known that he has done very very well, and then . . . not recognize you! When tormented by excessive Preppy manifestations—an outbreak of madras, monograms, and duck prints, for example—try the Caulfield Maneuvre: put a red hunting hat on backwards and have a nervous breakdown. HISTORY: Preps Ghouls hail, of course, from England, where private schools are called public schools (because they aren’t) and are all named (appropriately) after impossibly tight collars (Eton), or inflated pigs’ bladders (Rugby). The original Preps Ghoul attended the latter institution, and wrote the book, Tom Brownie’s Ghoul Days. The Yankee Preps Ghouls’ ancestors came over (steerage) on the Mayflower, to New England, where they hoped the Puritan work ethic would apply only to the working class. Here, they tended the ivy and climbed with it. They can now be found throughout America, wherever the parvenu rich don’t want their offspring to have to compete in examinations against the children of the intelligent. SPOTTER’S TIPS: You will find the Preps Ghoul loitering about wherever balding blond people of either sex look—and laugh—like their horses.
棲息地 妖精のなかでももっと
も一流志向の強い妖精たちで
田舎者が集まる都市に集中して
棲息している。 通称を“見栄は
る君” あるいは “ぶりっ子”と
いい, ファッション雑誌をその
ままコピーしたような服装を好
む若者たちに寄生して、彼らの
上昇志向をあおり,その結果,
軽薄な人間たちをつくりだして
よろこんでいる。
この妖精にとりつかれるとお
金がかかるのが特徴で, “金食
い虫”とも呼ばれている。 が、
お金を使っているわりにはパッ
とせず お金を使えば使うほど
世間のひんしゅくを買い,本人
の思っているほどかっこよくも
なく,ひとりよがりにおちいる
傾向がある。
習性 センスのない都会人やあ
かぬけない地方都市人間を好
み, 中央集権的文化の隆盛に一
役買っている。 なにがなんでも
一流品と名がつけばそこがこの
妖精たちの棲み家になり、餌は
ブランド物を買いあさる人間た
ちの“虚栄心”をもっぱら主食
として繁殖している。 そのかわ
りとりついた人間たちには
“くすぐり”という一種の幻覚
症状を与え、けっして不快な気
持ちにはさせない努力をしてい
るのが特徴。
そのため麻薬常用者のように
この妖精から逃げだすことはむ
ずかしく、なかには家や財産ば
かりでなく命までも失ってしま
う人間もいる。 そこで最近,こ
のような傾向を憂慮したわが政
府は,一掃キャンペーンをはじ
め,「人間やめますか、それと
もブランドやめますか?」 とい
う広告をテレビなどにさかんに
流している。
歴史 不明。 一説によると人類
の虚栄心とともに歩んできたと
いわれるが,いつごろのことな
のか定かではない。 ただあまり
貧しい国では繁殖能力が劣ると
ころから,この妖精たちが一般
に受け入れられるようになった
のは英国における産業革命以後
と推測される。 学者のなかには
こんな妖精の研究ほど 「時間の
むだなものはない」という者も
いるが,そういう学者にかぎっ
て お中元とお歳暮の中身には
うるさい。
いまやこの妖精たちは上流社
会から煙たがられ, 中流社会に
鞍替えをする傾向がめだってい
る。
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私立探偵の情報 身につけてい
彼ら自身が所有す
る一流品が,
る無教養さと同じくらいむなし
くキラキラ輝いて見える場所な
らどこにでもいる。
Habitat
The most status-obsessed of all sprites, concentrated in cities where country folk gather. Commonly known as “the show-off” or “the poser” — they parasitize young people who dress exactly like fashion magazine copies, stoking their upward aspirations and delighting in producing shallow, superficial human beings as a result.
Being possessed by this sprite is expensive — it’s also called the “money-eating bug.” But for all the money spent, the results are unimpressive. The more money spent, the more the world looks down on them — and the possessed never look as cool as they think, falling into a pattern of self-satisfied delusion.
Behavior
Favors tasteless city dwellers and unsophisticated provincial types, playing a role in the flourishing of centralized culture. Anything bearing the label “first class” becomes this sprite’s habitat — and it breeds primarily on the vanity of people who compulsively buy brand goods. In exchange it grants its possessed a kind of hallucination called “the tickle” — making a constant effort to ensure they never feel uncomfortable.
As a result, escaping this sprite is as difficult as escaping drug dependency, and some people lose not just their homes and assets but their lives. Alarmed by this trend, the government recently launched a cleanup campaign, broadcasting advertisements on television that ask: “Will you give up being human, or give up brands?”
History
Unknown. One theory holds that it has walked alongside human vanity since the dawn of civilization — but when exactly remains unclear. Since it breeds poorly in very poor countries, it’s presumed these sprites became generally accepted after the Industrial Revolution in Britain. Some scholars say there is no greater “waste of time” than studying these sprites — but those same scholars tend to be remarkably particular about the contents of their midsummer and year-end gifts.
These sprites are increasingly being shunned by upper-class society and showing a noticeable tendency to migrate downward to the middle class.
Field Intelligence
Wherever the brand goods people wear shine as emptily and glitteringly as the lack of education their owners possess.
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Fun fact. The girl in the Preps Ghoul images is Ben Asen’s Wife.
The Brooks Brothers Sign is on E 44th St at Madison Ave, NYC.
Anyone know where the other photos were taken.
Addendum:
For Greyfriars believers:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Brown%27s_School_Days gives an unambiguous namedrop. Happy Hunting.
Arthur Penrhyn Stanley … they talk about him …