by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
THE HIGH INTEREST WRAITHUsurious horribilus RANGE: Anywhere between inexplicably expensive and temporarily exorbitant, the High Interest Wraith can be found on either the downturn or the upswing. Wherever a small deposit will hold or no serious offer is refused, he...
by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
UNREAL ESTATE BROKERSVendores condominis fantastica RANGE: From coast to coast—and several hundred yards off shore—these cunning creatures can be found in almost any direction: down in the boondocks; between sliding hills and eroding beaches; on the side of a cliff;...
by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
THE GIANT (ECONOMY SIZE)Caveat emptor RANGE: Suburban shopping centers, inner cities, across the river, over the tracks, under new management, out of stock. Long ago, the Giant En-celadus loomed o’er the isles of Greece. Today, the Giant (Economy Size) looms...
by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
AMERICAN MOTOR GREMLINSInfernalis combustiones RANGE: Almost everyone has encountered these fiends at least twice. Their initial function is spell-casting. As one strolls past a dealer’s show window or used car lot, Gremlins blow fairy dust over some...
by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
THE JOB GOBLINOpus pocus RANGE: Out by the coffee machine, under the transmission, on the punch card, and off for vacation. From the union halls of California, to the chain stores of Tennessee; in the thick of every job action, fighting for truth, social justice, and...
by burnstyle | Dec 24, 2018 | American Version
TOLL TROLLSCoinus venderuptus RANGE: The Toll Troll can be found on bridges, thruways and turnpikes throughout the nation. He is a first cousin of the Lost Changeling, that exasperatingly greedy gremlin who makes his home in every vending machine everywhere. The Toll...
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